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Walkthrough by sdunigan
Version: 1.0 | Updated: 08/27/09
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx FAQ TITLE: The Optimized Straightforward Walkthru for Bureaucracy COPYRIGHT INFO: This FAQ is copyright 2009-2010 by Stanley E. Dunigan (email@example.com). This FAQ may be posted and used anywhere by anyone as long as it's unaltered, but always check one of the official websites listed below for the latest version. GameFAQs (www.gamefaqs.com) SuperCheats (www.supercheats.com) Neoseeker (www.neoseeker.com) Cheat Happens (www.cheathappens.com) FAQ DESCRIPTION: Like all of my optimized straightforward walkthrus, this FAQ is a complete walkthru for the game that has been optimized and organized to make it as fast and easy as possible to complete the game. I don't give any reference-style information or encourage you to do unnecessary things. In true walkthru fashion, I just tell you the answers without explaining or rationalizing them. If you want non-spoiler-ish hints, see the Bureaucracy hint file on the Universal Hint System (UHS) website at: www.uhs-hints.com. VERSION 1.0 (8/26/2009) NOTES AND CREDITS: This is the original release of this FAQ, so I have no special notes or credits to report yet. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx NOTE: This FAQ was written while playing the version of Bureaucracy that came with the Lost Treasures of Infocom II package that was released in 1992 by Activision. As far as I know, everything will be the same for other game versions. *** STEP 1: Get stuff from your house. *** The first thing you have to go through is the filling out of a very stupid and screwy form. The info you enter isn't totally useless, though, as you'll be required to remember some of it later. It's best to put the same one-letter answer in every field that doesn't require a number, and the same one-digit answer in every field that does. After that idiotic nightmare is over, go west and use the GET ALL command to pick a bunch of stuff up, then go back east and open the front door. Give the delivery man your Beezer card (GIVE BEEZER), then get the llama treats that he drops on the floor. *** STEP 2: Gather up everyone's mail. *** Open the front door again and go east. Open the mailbox and get the leaflet, then go south and ring the mansion's doorbell (RING BELL). Go north, east, and south, open the screen door, then go west and south to enter the mansion's trophy room. Get the painting, then go north and show it to the macaw. Get the mail the macaw was guarding, then drop the painting. Go east, north, and west to return to the street, then go south twice to find the llama-farm farmhouse. Open the bag of llama food, then open the mailbox and put the bag in it. Nab the mail from the feed trough (GET MAIL), then go south. Wait using the Z command until a voice says there's a radio connected to his brain. Go north and west to enter the llama-farm farmhouse, then wait until a weirdo shows up. Tell him what the voice at the fortified house said (SAY "UNFORTUNATELY, THERE'S A RADIO CONNECTED TO MY BRAIN"), then wait for him to give you the counter-phrase. Go east and south to return to the fortified house, then say the counter-phrase (SAY "ACTUALLY, IT'S THE BBC CONTROLLING US FROM LONDON"). Save your game before going south to enter the house, then answer the questions the paranoid guy asks you using the list below. If there are any you can't answer because I don't have them listed, you'll have to restore your save and try again. (Or check the stupid Popular Paranoia magazine in your game docs if you have it.) * What left-wing organisation ... government in America? NFL * Where is the centre of communist insurgency in the United States? OHIO * How are the dentists of America ... minds of our children? NOVOCAINE * What device is used by the banks ... American citizens? ATMS * What local government-subsidized program ... home privacy? CABLE TV * What are the Mexicans unleashing ... baseball franchise? KILLER BEES * The existence of which one of the fifty states ... purposes? DELAWARE * What well-meaning legislation ... destroy the American family? GI BILL * How do THEY learn so much about you? GARBAGE * By what percentage do students ... bubonic plague? 300 * Who is THEIR leader? QUEEN MUM * What is the breeding ground for most major diseases? YOGURT * What chemical is the international ... valuable body fat? ASPARTAME * What do Ronald Wilson Reagan ... because of it)? 666 * What secret FBI surveillance method ... a public service? TRAFFIC HELICOPTERS After you're thrown into a "gaol" cell, try to saw through its door with your hacksaw (SAW DOOR). Pull the lever on the weirdo's Swiss army knife to get the generator attachment (PULL LEVER), then sit on it (SIT ON GENERATOR). Press the knife's button to eject a power saw, then pick it up and plug it into the generator (PLUG POWER SAW INTO GENERATOR). Give it to the weirdo (GIVE POWER SAW TO WEIRDO), then drop the hacksaw and Swiss army knife. Go north to exit the cell, then wait until the weirdo climbs the stairs. Go up and get the mail, then go north to exit the house. Go north five more times, then east. Knock on the door, then go south and give your leaflet to the man. You can then take the last bit of mail. *** STEP 3: Get ready to leave town. *** Go north, west, south, and east to enter a restaurant. Open its back door, then wait if necessary for a waitress to start talking to you. Type YES, then answer the questions she asks you. It doesn't matter which answers you choose, as long as they're valid answers. After that tedious ordeal is over, wait for a waiter to show up and ask you the same questions all over again. Thankfully, you can enter random valid answers again without having to remember what you chose the first time. After you confirm your order with a YES, wait for the food to arrive, then eat it and go south to escape without paying. Har! Go west, north, and west to enter a bookstore. Look at the software, then use the G (short for AGAIN) command until the clerk asks if you want to see his "special" carts. Type YES, then open the small case you have with you. Get the game cart from it, then give it to the clerk to get the special recipe cart. Go east, north, and west to enter the travel agency, then trade in your letter for an airline ticket (GIVE LETTER. GET TICKET). Go east, then go north however many times it takes to get into the bank. Go north again to move up to the randomized array of ten teller windows, then go east and west as necessary until you find the withdrawal window. Say YES to the withdrawal teller, then fill out the slip she gives you (FILL OUT SLIP). Enter the same name you did in the game-starting form, an amount of 75, and N for illegal activity. Find the deposit window, then open the envelope you got earlier and get the check from it. Save your game, then give the slip to the teller. Give her the check next, then show her your passport. If the bank stupidly closes at any point during that process, restore your save, wait for it to close, reenter it, find the deposit window (and say NO), then try again. Once it's done, find the withdrawal window and ask for a slip. Fill it out just like you did before, then save your game (in case of another ill-timed closing) before giving it to the teller and showing her your passport. Use the GO HOME command to return to your house's front room, then go west. Read your address book, and choose LAST when prompted for a page. Find the airport cab's phone number, then call it (as in CALL 373-1098). To answer the questions, type in the last name you entered on the game-starting form, then the word AIRPORT, then your house's street name and number. If you don't remember them, you can go east from your front room for a reminder (before you call). Wait until the guy comes back on the line and says he's sending a cab over, then go east twice. Drop the Beezer card, wallet, small case, envelope, magazine, flyer, and booklet to clear out your inventory, then wait for a cab to pull up in front of you. Type IN, then answer YES and show the driver your passport. Answer YES again, wait until you arrive at the airport, then pay the driver (GIVE $17.50 TO DRIVER). *** STEP 4: Fly off to the jungle. *** Go east until you find yourself in an airport entrance area that doesn't list Air Zalagasa, then go north twice to reach the Air Zalagasa desk. Wait until the time-wasting fat man leaves and the clerk turns to you, then give him your airline ticket. Answer DIRECT, then go south and climb the pillar. Use the G command to reach the top of the pillar, then open the grate. Go up four times to find another grate, then open it and enter it to find the air traffic control tower. Tell them to stop the flight that your exchange ticket is for (CONTROLLERS, STOP FLIGHT 42), then enter the grate again. Go down four times to return to the top of the pillar, then pull out the speaker's red and black wires (PULL RED AND BLACK WIRES). Touch them together (CONNECT RED AND BLACK WIRES), then go down twice to be taken to your plane. Get up, then sit down again in seat C (SIT IN SEAT C). Wait for the flight attendant to ask what you want for dinner. No matter what you choose, you'll get a hideous llama stew. Go to row 8 with the GO TO ROW 8 command, then sit in seat D. Press the light button to get your horrid stew dumped (notice the whiff you get of something truly hellish). Go to the rear of the plane (GO TO REAR), then wait until the flight attendant says there's a telephone call for you. Answer the phone, then answer YES to all of the questions. Wait until the flight attendant comes by again, then give her the secret pass-phrase (STINGLAI KA'ABI) to get a parachute. Open the emergency hatch (LIFT HANDLE. PULL HANDLE), then wait until you can see the flight attendant through the window of the plane's hatch. Knock on the window to get her to help you get uncaught, then open your parachute (PULL RIPCORD) and wait until you land in a tree in the jungle. *** STEP 5: Enter the Persecution Complex. *** Remove your parachute to fall down into a cooking pot, then put the recipe cart into the computer to get the natives to run off with it after giving you a new cart and your old address book. Get out of the pot, then open the locker by using the following three commands in order: TURN LEFT AND MIDDLE HANDLES TURN LEFT AND RIGHT HANDLES TURN LEFT AND MIDDLE HANDLES You can now open the locker, enter it, and get the magnetic keycard. Exit the locker, then go east and note what the room number is. Go east again and note the new room number, then subtract the first room number from it. The rightmost digit of the answer tells you which way to go next. See the table below. 0 = East 1 = South 2 = Up 3 = North 4 = Down 5 = West For instance, if the first room's number was 15, and the second room's number was 29, you'd get 29 - 15 = 14, the rightmost digit of which is 4. That means you need to go down next, since 4 is down on the above table. After you go down, subtract the previous room's number (29 in this example) from the current room's number to see which way you need to go next. After you do that several times, you'll enter an airlock. Put the magnetic keycard into the airlock slot, then try to open the door. Use the G command until you actually get the door open, then go north to enter the Persecution Complex. *** STEP 6: Sabotage the nerd and win the game. *** Go west four times to find a modular plug. Attach your computer to it (PLUG COMPUTER IN), then type in an ID of RANDOM-Q-HACKER and a password of RAINBOW- TURTLE. Note that password characters won't appear as you type them, so go slow to make sure you get it right. After you're logged on, use the RUN command and enter PLANE.EXE for the file. Then repeatedly use the DIR command until you get a message saying that user RQH is about to use a certain .HAK file. Run the COP command and type in DVH2.HAK for the name of the file to copy. For the name of the new file, enter the name of the file that user RQH is about to use. For example, if he were about to use the MENU.HAK file, that's what you'd type. Enter Y to confirm that you want to overwrite MENU.HAK (or whatever) with DVH2.HAK, then use the QUIT command to exit the computer. Go west and up, then wait for an airplane to show up and fly you back home -- almost. Go west and type GO HOME, then read the new letter to finish the game.