Review by t0rsion

Reviewed: 04/16/03 | Updated: 04/17/03

Postal 2 provides a whole bunch of tastey ingrediants but unfortunatly they were all thrown together into one big boring mess

I don't normally bother with reviews, but there are exceptions, I will review a game if its either A: Extremly good, better than good, excellent, or B: It promises to be a top notch game and a valuble addition to my collection but fails miserably leaving me very dissapointed, Postal 2, is the latter, let me tell you why -- I (like many, many others around the globe) was extremly excited about the prospect of a game such as Postal 2, on various sites I seen screenshots and information about what this game will feature, the first word that came into my head when reading this was 'fun', the idea of being able to do as you please, when you please, and how you please, is a good way to lure us gamers into taking a great amount of interest in the game.

Now this game does actually give you all of the above, but this is where the problems begin to start. As with the massively popular GTAIII you can basically go where you want (with exception to the parts that are blocked early in the game) but theres 1 problem that gets very much in the way of this, and this isn't a small problem, oh no, least not for me, and I would put my life on it that this subject gets raised alot more in the future --the loading sections on the map. This is the single most annoying part of almost any game I have ever come across. It wouldn't be so bad if they were spread out, but no, some are even within a 10 second walk of each other, now this is really takes the piss (excuse my french.) Not only that but each a section loads it takes on average around a minute, if this were 10, maybe even 20 seconds i could live with that, possibly. I don,t get why this was put into the game in the first place, surely the developers must of known it would annoy people? Though after reading the official postal 2 website, I can see how this won't affect alot of Postal 2 fans, as they will probably be content with waiting for these parts of the map to load while they swig their carling and smoke their joint.

But don't get me wrong, i'm not totally against this game soley because of the loading, no, far from it. To be blunt, this game fails in almost every way possible.
Lets goto the graphics -- Ok I was led to believe this was powered by the Unreal Warfare engine? Now I have been fan of Unreal Tournament since the first day it was released, the graphics shocked me, also with the new Unreal Tournament 2003 the graphics were stunning, may I also add it ran as smooth as a babys bum on my computer, even with the settings maxed out, like they are on every game I buy. But for some reason, Postal 2 seemed to run slowly with the settings set to high, even with these mediocre graphics. The outdoor enviroments wern't completly bad, cedit were credits due, sometimes I came accross a location that looked quite nice, but they were far and few between. As for the interiors....more dissapointment, the majority all look the same, same txtures used again and again and again..ect. Thats enough about graphics, them darn boring textures are stuck in my head, arghhh!

Now the most important aspect of any game, the gameplay, the main reason I was looking forward to this game. Ok I loaded up, I took hold of my mouse in one hand and my other hand on the keyboard, was all set with my drink next to me, well here I am, after all these months of waiting I finally get to play it. I ran straight down the road overlooking the spade in the little shed, and started to kick the first person I came to repeatedly.......hmmm there not dying?!? 5 minutes down the line and a few cops on my tail, he finally dies, woohooo! So then like a good boy I stopped and got arrested. Now how do I get out of this jail cell? ahha is that a sprinkler I spot, yes it is, well i'll put my matches to good use shall I, at this point I thought this would be a pretty fun game, from here on in it only got worse, spades that take around 4 hits to get there head off (which isn't even that realistic) followed by kickin the head and mutated body around for a bit, this gets tiresome very fast. One part I did find ammusing though was when I kicked the head through the window and the dog picked it up, nice little touch there. As for the rest of the weapons, well, notthing special at all, the handgun takes too many shots to kill, even in the head, though I didn't see any difference between shooting in the head or in any other body part. They didn't even have a scratch on them after shooting or kicking, or hitting with a space ect. The one thing I did like about the weapons was the kind of homing missle on the napalm gun, after the power was on full. Was nice watching them run away but 9 times out of 10 always getting hit. Overall gameplay gets boring very quickly, the missions are dull throughout the whole game, chopping heads off and setting people on fire is only fun for so long, an basically thats all this game is about, theres no skill to it what-so-ever, move forward kit them with a spade, quickly move back to dodge them then repeat another 5 times.

As for a story/plot, its basically run a few errands each day, an what gets me is, people say you don't have to go postal, but on many of the missions you have to do to continue the game, something happens which makes it (at least nearer the end of the game) very difficult to avoid going postal, as you usually have to fight your way out f a building, runnng into alot of people that want to kill you too, so playing the whole game without going postal, isn't really an option, its just as easy to kill everyone you encounter anyway.

Onto sound, this is probably the best part of the game and even this could be greatly improved. My first complaint, when you chop a head off whats with them sounding like a carboard box falling to the floor? This was extremly annoying, apart from that gun sounds were average, music was ok, but to be honest I was too busy being mad at the whole game I didn't give a damn about the sound. Oh yeh the voice actin was ok throughout, most of the lines that (I assume) were meant to be funny, really arn't to be honest, but maybe i'm just too serious -- let me have some of that joint and i'll give postal 2 another try.

In summary this game is a mjaor dissapointment, i'm sure the lunatics and pysco's out there will still love it seein as you can pee on people and set them on fire -- if you want a game that lasts, has fast paced action and much better blood and gore, go with Soldier of fortune 1&2, if you want the ability to freely explore a town and kill people, go with GTAII & vice city. If you wanna waste some money, go with this game.

Gameplay - 3 - Gets boring very fast
Graphics - 7 Notthing special
Sound - 5 Average
Value for money - 1 - there are alot of budget games out there better than this
Tilt - 1 - hugely dissapointing game, waste of time and money
Overall - 3 - blah

Rating:   1.5 - Bad

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