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  3. mental wellness at board 8 [bipolar] [depression] [anxiety] [health] [antipurge]

User Info: WhiteLens

WhiteLens
1 month ago#181
Been dealing with insomnia for like the past 3 months. It's not so much that I have trouble falling asleep (which I have been getting a lot better about lately), but more that I keep waking up after a few hours of sleep and can very rarely fall back asleep. So I end up getting only like 2-4 hours of sleep a night.

As you can tell that's been taking a toll on me both physically and mentally.

It's hard for me to even pinpoint what's causing this. They say it can be caused by depression, anxiety, or stress, but I don't really feel those too much at the moment. I guess the biggest factor could very well be my constant worry over sleep itself.

I've tried sleep medication and while they can keep get me to fall asleep, they don't really keep me asleep. Besides, I don't want to grow a dependency on them.
http://www.backloggery.com/whitelens | https://myanimelist.net/profile/WhiteLens
I advocate Kaiser Advokaiser for winning Guru!

User Info: GTM

GTM
1 month ago#182
I just beat Celeste. It's great btw
GTM - Boko United
survivor and dillos and nintendo and wrestling

User Info: Waluigi1

Waluigi1
1 month ago#183
Just f***ing got my car stuck in a ditch. I f***ing HATE myself. It's my own f***ing fault, wasn't paying attention as I was coming up on a stop sign too fast and slammed on my breaks on the wet road and caused me to spin out. GODf***INGDAMMIT

Second f***ing time this has happened under very similar circumstances. Was on my way to a neighboring town to pick up a friend after work. Late and not paying enough attention. f***. f*** f*** f*** f*** f*** goddamit. Why do I do this. Why am I like this.
PSN, and GT: Waluigi1
Switch FC: SW-6848-3841-9099
(edited 1 month ago)

User Info: Waluigi1

Waluigi1
1 month ago#184
So, by some miracle a tow truck drove by and offered to pull me out with no charge. The car still runs and the main damage is to the front bumper so all in all, not too terrible. Could have gone much worse. I should at least he thankful for my health and a non-totaled car.
PSN, and GT: Waluigi1
Switch FC: SW-6848-3841-9099

User Info: GTM

GTM
1 month ago#185
bump2
GTM - Boko United
survivor and dillos and nintendo and wrestling

User Info: DpObliVion

DpObliVion
1 month ago#186
I'm so sick of doing the same pointless things and living the same miserable life every day, but being too scared to even try to change things.
LGM

User Info: Waluigi1

Waluigi1
1 month ago#187
DpObliVion posted...
I'm so sick of doing the same pointless things and living the same miserable life every day, but being too scared to even try to change things.

Preach man.
PSN, and GT: Waluigi1
Switch FC: SW-6848-3841-9099

User Info: NioraptH

NioraptH
4 weeks ago#188
Too many things happening in a short amount of time and I'm surprised I made it this far considering where I was last year

Got reassigned at work to a dept that has more responsibilities and I'm barely catching up.

Great grandma (around 90+ years old) had a risky surgery for her hip... slowly recovering at grandaunt's house.

Dad had a heartattack and got bypass surgery with high risk as he is a diabetic smoker... slowly recovering at home.

Grandma needs to get a pacemaker fitted but she has shingles so it has been postponed next week. Is at specialist hospital with aunt.

All within days of each other.
Am just running on autopilot but it scares ne how numb I am...
Everyone is headstrong so I can't appear weak... and most of the paperwork I had to handle because tbqh if I didn't have distractions I'd just be a ball of stress.
Managed to cry it out a bit when I went for lunch with my bff on Sunday.

Skipped work to take care of grandma but I got quarantined at home instead for chicken pox risk as I have never gotten it before

I just want to cry so much.
I'm just so worried all the time... and now I can't even sleep at night and it's affecting my ability to function.
Been distracting self with youtube but I don't know how long that will last.
"Got any paper? Then we can draw our swords!" - random Dynasty Warriors 8 Hulao Gate grunt
TONE DEAF EDM MONKS -- THE BEST
(edited 4 weeks ago)

User Info: DpObliVion

DpObliVion
4 weeks ago#189
That is a lot. Wishing you and your family well.
LGM

User Info: GTM

GTM
3 weeks ago#190
bump
GTM - Boko United
survivor and dillos and nintendo and wrestling
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