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  3. KSA condemns Canada's appalling human rights record of selling arms to KSA

User Info: Itoldyaso

2 years ago#1
Riyadh, Saudi Arabia – In the wake of the diplomatic row over Canada’s support of political prisoners, Saudi Arabia continues to put out press releases and social media statements attacking Canada for its record on indigenous rights, women’s rights and political oppression. Its latest salvo: blasting Canada for selling arms to violent, autocratic regimes like Saudi Arabia.

“How dare Canada interfere with the domestic affairs of a sovereign state,” said spokesman for the Kingdom Salman Al-Ansari. “Especially when it is currently sending millions of dollars worth of military equipment to a regime that it knows will use the equipment to brutally crackdown on dissent and political opposition.”

“I mean, talk about hypocritical,” he added.

Sources inside the Kingdom say Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salmon is so furious over Canada’s meddling that he wasn’t able to enjoy watching the public crucifixion happening in the square. He sees the matter as an example of the ‘those who live in glass house’ parable, especially when one considers that Canada, for all its talk of human rights, is willing to send arms to a country that still crucifies people.

However Canada does not appear to be backing down from its position.

“Saudi Arabia can recall its diplomat and pull students as it wants. Nothing, and I mean nothing, will stop our country from issuing vague platitudes about human rights,” said foreign affairs Minister Freeland.

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m late for a meeting about selling machine guns to Robert Mugabe.”

Canada’s trade strategy of arms-for-human rights hit a snag on Sunday when the Saudi government expelled the Canadian Ambassador and suspended any new business after asking for the release of an arrested women’s rights activist.

Canada’s polite request for the immediate release of Samar Badawi on the Foreign Affairs Twitter account was the country’s boldest statement on Saudi Arabia’s poor human rights record since it left a friendly reminder to follow the Geneva Convention on a Post-it note left in an armoured car’s glove compartment.

“We had a deal with the Saudis,” said a disappointed Foreign Affairs Minister Chrystia Freeland. “We would give them one armoured vehicle in exchange for one human right. Canada’s foreign policy is based on trust, which we are confident will one day pay off.”

The LAVs-for-Liberties Agreement between the two countries allows Saudi Arabia to import $15 billion worth of arms while Canada exports its smug sense of superiority on human rights. The deal showed some promise after the oil-rich nation made some reforms such as permitting women to drive in a country they can’t leave without permission from a man.

“For a country that liberally dishes out lashes for dissent, and is currently bombing Yemen, I find this very disappointing that they would do something like this,” explained Freeland.

This is not the first time Canada has taken a bold stand for the rights of others in countries that buy Canadian arms. Earlier this year, the Philippines government cancelled a $234 million attack helicopter deal with Canada despite promises that strongman President Rodrigo Duterte would perform one less extra-judicial killing for every helicopter he received.

Satires, obviously

User Info: Winsage

2 years ago#2
The crown prince has really backed himself into a corner on this issue. I wonder how he's going to try and save face from this massive temper tantrum.
NNid: Windsage

User Info: TundraKing87

2 years ago#3
Doesn't need to. The Saudis and Israelis spit roast the west.

User Info: Eagleeyejack

2 years ago#4
TundraKing87 posted...
Doesn't need to. The Saudis and Israelis spit roast the west.

It's gonna be funny when the oil runs out and these contries suddenly find themselves booted off the world stage and all the billions the west gives them in aid and defense goes away. Isreal will be f***ed once the US isn't keeping them from being bombed into oblivion.
Feel free to Private message me if you want to speak to me.

User Info: onemoment1985

2 years ago#5
Oh, is this a parody news site? I've never seen this one before now.

User Info: TundraKing87

2 years ago#6
Yep. The real Saudis merely retweeted 9/11 inspired threats and crucified a lad.
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